My Opponent "Accidentally" Loses The Game | Brewer's Kitchen
Well, hello there! Brewer’s Kitchen here and today our opponents go out on their own terms. We merely give them the tools to so… We might also be controlling their mind… Anyways, here’s a breakdown of this abomination of a deck and don’t forget to watch the video as well:
The Gameplan
First of all, this deck emerged from a brainstorming on what would be the most ridiculous way to win with Emrakul, the Promised End #330 Retro. If looking at the decklist didn’t already say enough: Don’t craft this if you want to win games! Unless you want to win by possessing you opponent and making them kill themselves. But why would anybody want to do that?
As ridiculous as this premise sounds, Magic’s card pool is deep enough to do pretty much anything.
Emrakul, the Promised End #330 Retro makes you control your opponent during their next turn when you cast it. And while this can be very powerful, Mindslaver #63 Showcase effects usually just allow you to sabotage your opponent rather than killing them. Especially since Emrakul’s trigger will grant the opponent an additional turn afterwards to ease the destruction. We need a way to make sure they have the tools to end themselves on the spot once we take control. Since we have no agency over the cards in our opponent’s deck, we got to bring the tools ourselves and give them to our opponent.
Adanto Vanguard #1 and Doom Whisperer #128 both have activated abilities that cost nothing but life. Luckily, both of them are actually descent creatures because this deck needs any help it can get.
Once we know we can get cast Emrakul soon, we use The Trickster-God's Heist #232 or Switcheroo #71 to trade them for our opponent’s best creature.
Now, once the Emrakul trigger makes us control our opponent’s turn, we can use our gifted creature to make them pay life to their ability until they die. Needless to say, this deck does not attack and really hates when the opponent gains life. For this plan to work, their life total has to be divisible by 4 (or 2 if they have a Doom Whisperer #128). This whole plan doesn’t work at all if the opponent doesn’t play any creatures. Again, don’t play this at home.
To make sure we can cast Emrakul as cheap as possible, we need different card types in our graveyard. Grapple with the Past #160 and Grisly Salvage #164 help us fill the yard and pick up combo pieces along the way. Tamiyo, Collector of Tales #220 mills and recurs card attached to another card type. Cemetery Tampering #135 mills us continuously and can sometimes cheat out an Emrakul for free if we can hide it away.
And that’s basically the whole gameplan. No interaction, we lose most games, but sometimes we get the opponent with the weirdest Emrakul trigger possible… Possible on Arena, that is. Imagine if we had Lethal Vapors #68 on the client.
The only tip I can give you, if you decide to actually play this list is: The cheapest, Emrakul can be in this deck is 6 mana. You might find yourself in a situation where you have a Doom Whisperer #128 on the battlefield and a The Trickster-God's Heist #232 or Switcheroo #71 hidden away under a Cemetery Tampering #135. In this case, surveil as much as you can before your draw step for the chance of hitting an Emrakul and pull off the combo out of nowhere.
Wrap up
This deck has the most unique and clunky inconvenient win condition I’ve played so far. It’s more of a proof of concept. But the games where it actually worked were a rush to play. Especially since I really needed my opponents not to scoop to get the footage on camera. I wouldn’t recommend anybody to spend wildcards on this. If you have everything in your collection and don’t mind losing a lot of games, I guess I’ll promise not to scoop if I run into you on Arena.
If you have questions or ideas for this or any other deck, you can reach me on Twitter @Brewers_Kitchen or at brewerskitchen@mtggoldfish.com.
